hate human being......hate being an human...

human???cruel,realistic,rude.....everything.......n emotional....like me...sometimes i really wish to kill myself.....y my life like this???i hate this.......and nw im in fren house doing the assignment......the assignment that hand up tmr....jz done.....damn relax....can go bck slp....i love my bed.....ya baby......hahaha....tat call emotional....that me....last min work......emo....n suicide.....feeling???moody,happy......two of them inside my mind nw.....insane.......nid to slp.....too tired....gd nite kampar.....

insomnia.....

recently....i have serious insomnia.....i cant slp at night....i can only slp at the morning....
i was thinking alot of things.....this,that........im tired.....pls let me rest...im bagging u...
i was thinking about..were suicide will make it better???did whn a person died...
he never have to think or pay???were suicide are escape??i dun think so...
suicide is let everything in ur mind disappear....who said a child no panic??
im the one who a child in panic......wat i panic for???alot.....pls let me go.....
i really hope tat GOD can hear wat im saying.....n wat im thinking...
GOD.....pls save me.....out of the world.....this fake,pretending,cruel...world....
n i was stay at tis world ady 18yrs.....pls...im really bagging u...save me.....

moody...

recently....my feeling goes to moody.......and many things to let me figured......the relationship...
the money......i think i gt to change my way.....in Chinese..has 1 word called "a bird without leg"...
mayb i should be that way...a bird never stop...keep upgrading...keep changing....
nw i can feel the "reality world" in my dic.....and i realize 1 important things tat is...
never let anyone know who u are and wat u thinking......tat the way nw I'm facing....
everything in my dic will nw changing....to more reality and more pretending.....
pretend=is the things tat very important to anyone...including me.....
finally.....i found out.....im nt love her anymore.....and remember....i will keep changing...and pretending.....bcareful.....

tmr.....

on tmr morning....
which mean later on 0830 i will goin bck to my home town...
n enjoy my sam break.....is early trip....so i din slp....
i was nw wondering bout whn i goin to next lvl...
am i still in where i am???
mayb i will be the nex class....or wat??
haiz....jz forget about it.......is nth i can do with tat.....
DONT EVER TALK TO MYSELF PLS!!!!

in the evening.....

today i was finish my 1st and oso the last paper.....KA....

in the evening....my fren was calling me....

go swimming....thn i go wif three frens...

wif motocycle......whn we reach up there...(the destination we goin is on higher mountain)

we saw alot of ppl...omost fulll......thn we jz play around lol....

thn after 1 hour many ppl was start leaving thn only we start swimming.....

my fren was start swimming...and i...taking photo....bcos tat was beautiful...

i mean the mother nature.....finally...my phone was drop into the water......

haiz....sad......

juz nw..

i was crying jz nw......whn three of us talking about our pass ppl in our life....

i have no idea hw long i din cry......i was thinking bout my grandma.....

she are the most beautiful person in my life......bt her impression in my memory are not much...

bcos she die whn i was in standard 3........in that time...i was crazy...i cant imagine the person who oways care bout me..love me....was.....died.....my heart was stop working...i love her....i do.....i've never forgot everything about her...the smiles.....

until nw i still can remember the day she die...i was crying infront of the coffin....

i believe whn my tears drop at the coffin.....she will come bck..am i naif??

i was crying.....its omost 10 years...grandma.....whr r u??are u in the heaven nw???

i miss u grandma.....did u hear me??

did love.......

did love oways rite??

wat i mean??the gurl wif me rite nw are nt the one i love...

i dunoe wether i love her ant?bt since we noe each other....

i think she love me more than i do....the gurl i love was start leaving my life...

she are goin to work as a airline hostess....wat im thinking about?

i never told her that i love her........last time whn im goin bck to my home town..

i saw her at the railway station.....she looking at me and smile to me.....

thn her father was arrive to fetch her...did i regret tat i never told her??

i've no idea....

recently...

recently i was watching a movie call Happy Funeral 2.....

a part of the movie was saying a gurl has write an poem...

the title of poem is Suicide.....

"Death....is easy...like a plastic bag....jumping into the sky waving to god...."

i dunoe wether this is a gd poem.....

bt it represent my feeling......

wat will i think whn im suicide???jump into the sky??

wat the feeling??could anyone tell me?

damn tired....

i've jz done my assignment......

has been 2 days.....

nw my brain was empty.....

cant even think......

really tired......

tis was my assignment tittle=Recycling??!!